Voldemom 1

So yes, I know all about Voldemort’s tragic backstory(TM)1, I’ve read the books. But think how much more interesting it would have been if, at the beginning of book four when you-know-who is about to murder hapless Frank Bryce, the Voldemom comes shuffling out of the shadows in a floral print housecoat and carpet slippers, curlers ...

T-minus one week till the WSFS business meeting 5

I hope you kids are warming up your serpentine muscles AW YISS. @ForestofGlory on Twitter asked me what I thought about a few of the items on the WSFS agenda this year, and I realized that due diligence means I really ought to look at all the upcoming items before I get to the meeting ...

[Movie] Star Trek: Beyond

Star Trek Beyond makes a for a good apology for the aggravating mess that was Star Trek: Into Darkness. But it fails hard at its most basic job: being a Star Trek film. This is a trend that’s been endemic since the first new Trek film and has only gotten worse with each movie. The original ...

I have no witty comeback for this racism. 2

So I’m biking along a mostly-deserted stretch of road north of Longmont and it’s hot as the Devil’s ballsack out there. I’m two-thirds of the way through my three liter camelback, and I’ve looped around to go back into town before I turn into a crispy strip of people leather on a bike. Another cyclists ...

Blue Team Best Team 5

Blue Team Best Team
I wasn’t going to play Pokémon Go. Seriously. I’ve never played Pokémon in my entire life. I still have zero desire to pick up any of the other games, because I am not interested in that kind of grind. But then my friend Corina wanted to go for a long walk and catch all the ...

[Movie] Ghostbusters (2016) 2

[Movie] Ghostbusters (2016)
Warning: depending upon your spoiler sensitivity level, you may want to skip the plot synopsis (red) until after you’ve seen the film. Ghostbusters (2016) comes to us in a world saturated with sequels and remakes and reboots that no one wanted, needed, or asked for—and finally, we get a reboot we actually deserve. I have ...

[Movie] Warcraft

It says a lot that it’s been something like two weeks since I saw Warcraft and I’m only now writing about it. Mostly because… honestly? I don’t have a lot to say. The thing you need to understand here is that I’ve played all the original Warcraft RTS games, and devoted more hours of my life ...

[Movie] Independence Day: Resurgence

In news that should come as no surprise to anyone who has ever spent five minutes in a room with me, I enjoyed the hell out of this movie. Please note here, I am not going to make any claims that it is a good movie, by whatever measure of good you want to pretend is ...

Alternate Titles for X-Men: Apocalypse

X-MEN: The Best Apology for X3 We’ll Get Because Seppuku Isn’t Exactly Legal The Perfect Mohawk Storm We Need to Talk About Erik A Decade Later and Charles and Erik Are Still Arguing About Who Broke That Fucking Pickle Dish Marriage Counseling Would Be Cheaper Than an Apocalypse You Sure Don’t Look Ten Years Older Moira McTaggert ...

Been Busy Not Living in Texas 7

Been Busy Not Living in Texas
I can’t believe it’s been ten days since I finished my move. Where the fuck has the time gone? I feel like I just got here, and yet… I won’t say that I regret the time I spent in Houston. That would be grossly unfair to the wonderful coworkers and the stimulating and fun work ...