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conspiracy theory stoopid

More HAARP conspiracy nuttiness

Chavez says US ‘weapon’ caused Haiti quake

Venezuelan leader Hugo Chavez Wednesday accused the United States of causing the destruction in Haiti by testing a ‘tectonic weapon’ to induce the catastrophic earthquake that hit the country last week.

And:

Venezuelan media have reported that the earthquake “may be associated with the project called HAARP, a system that can generate violent and unexpected changes in climate.”

The absolute breadth of the stupid leaves me almost speechless. Almost.

I’d love to know exactly how people think an atmospheric research facility – even if we’re nice and allow the conspiracy nuts the notion that HAARP can somehow effect climate via it interaction with the atmosphere, which it can’t – can manage to effect the Earth’s crust, 10 km below the surface and almost a hemisphere away. You know, we think the atmosphere is pretty awesome, probably because we couldn’t live without it. But let me break it to you – tectonic forces really don’t give much of a shit what the atmosphere is doing. In fact, it’s really the tectonics that get the final say on what the climate is doing, not the other way around.

Otherwise, what kind of tectonic “weapon” are we proposing? Secret injection well that’s putting highly pressurized fluid in to the fault to lubricate it? Nah, too plausible. Underground atomic explosions? These are the sorts of things people would tend to notice.

It makes my brain hurt. But we also know that conspiracy nuttiness of this variety requires no plausible mechanism. And in this case, not even a vague understanding of geology.

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