[Movie] Star Trek: Beyond

Star Trek Beyond makes a for a good apology for the aggravating mess that was Star Trek: Into Darkness. But it fails hard at its most basic job: being a Star Trek film. This is a trend that’s been endemic since the first new Trek film and has only gotten worse with each movie. The original ...

[Movie] Ghostbusters (2016) 2

[Movie] Ghostbusters (2016)
Warning: depending upon your spoiler sensitivity level, you may want to skip the plot synopsis (red) until after you’ve seen the film. Ghostbusters (2016) comes to us in a world saturated with sequels and remakes and reboots that no one wanted, needed, or asked for—and finally, we get a reboot we actually deserve. I have ...

[Movie] Warcraft

It says a lot that it’s been something like two weeks since I saw Warcraft and I’m only now writing about it. Mostly because… honestly? I don’t have a lot to say. The thing you need to understand here is that I’ve played all the original Warcraft RTS games, and devoted more hours of my life ...

[Movie] Independence Day: Resurgence

In news that should come as no surprise to anyone who has ever spent five minutes in a room with me, I enjoyed the hell out of this movie. Please note here, I am not going to make any claims that it is a good movie, by whatever measure of good you want to pretend is ...

Alternate Titles for X-Men: Apocalypse

X-MEN: The Best Apology for X3 We’ll Get Because Seppuku Isn’t Exactly Legal The Perfect Mohawk Storm We Need to Talk About Erik A Decade Later and Charles and Erik Are Still Arguing About Who Broke That Fucking Pickle Dish Marriage Counseling Would Be Cheaper Than an Apocalypse You Sure Don’t Look Ten Years Older Moira McTaggert ...

[Movie] Thoughts on Captain America: Civil War 7

Well, holy shit. I went in expecting a hot mess that I’d love anyway (hello, Age of Ultron) and instead got a movie that I feel like I need to make dying seagull noises about and then place it on a shelf next to Captain America: The Winter Soldier. I’m not going to write a more standard-ish review. ...

[Movie] The Boss 2

The Boss isn’t getting very good reviews. As of right now, it’s at 17% on Rotten Tomatoes. (For what it’s worth, The Huntsman: Winter’s War is only at 19% and I thought that was pulpy fantasy fun, so maybe I just have terrible taste.) But I decided to see it anyway, for exactly one reason: the ...

[Movie] The Huntsman: Winter’s War 1

As half-prequel, half-sequel to 2012’s Snow White and the Huntsman, The Huntsman: Winter’s War pretty much nails everything that was fun about the first film (namely, the Huntsman and the Evil Queen Ravenna) and leaves behind the less arresting bits (eg: Kristen Stewart’s Snow White). If you liked the first movie, you’re going to like this one. ...

[Movie] Hardcore Henry: what happens when you make an FPS into a movie?

Hardcore Henry is a scifi action film shot entirely in first person. Unlike handheld camera movies like Blair Witch or Cloverfield, there’s never an outside look at the protagonist; we’re supposed to be literally seeing through his eyes. It feels like someone’s taken a first person shooter game and rendered it in film, which is its strength as ...

[Movie] 10 Cloverfield Lane 1

I almost didn’t watch this movie. I never saw Cloverfield, and heard enough about it that I wasn’t really all that interested in it. So something that sounded like it might be a sequel wasn’t really on my radar. But then I heard from Sunil that this was a standalone thing, and more importantly, there weren’t ...