women – Alex Acks: Sound and Nerdery

A friend of mine is doing a research project and is looking for female gamers and male gamers who have played in mixed gender groups that she can survey. We’re talking gamers of all kinds – tabletop, board games, CCGs, MMOs, all manner of RP.

If you are interested in helping out, please answer the following questions and e-mail them to Ivona Elenton AT ivona.elenton at gmail dot com . You can make your answers as long or as short as you want.

Please have your answers to Ivona by 10/10/13! Thank you!

ETA: (From Ivona) “Though question 5 is only directed toward 2 genders, I’m absolutely interested in the experiences of queer and gendervariant people as well.”

QUESTIONS FOR FEMALE GAMERS

1. How long have you been gaming?

2. List the games that you enjoy or have enjoyed playing (table top or on line rpgs, computer/videogames, MMOS, board games LARPS or others)

3. Tell the story of how you started, what or who drew you into gaming? How were your first gaming sessions? Etc. etc.

4. Do you enjoy playing with others or alone the most?

4b. If you have a clear preference, could you please motivate why you prefer one over the other.

4c. If you do not have a clear preference, could you mention some strong points with either or both ways of gaming

5. If you play or have played in groups, do you have any preference on gender balance in a gaming group? (somewhat equal in gender ratios, mostly females, mostly males) Please motivate why you have a preference, if this is the case.

6. Have you ever experienced, in any gaming setting, being treated differently as a gamer because of your gender. Please tell the full story if the answer is yes.

7. Do you think there is a general difference in style or culture between female gamers and male gamers? (if yes, please elaborate)

8. What about the games themselves, have you ever experienced that games or game developers cater to a specific gender? (if yes, please elaborate)

9. Recent studies have shown that about half of all gamers are female, and yet some male gamer groups have expressed surprise at these statistics. Why do you think this comes as a surprise to many? Could female gamers be less visible in various settings, and if so, how come?

10. Would you please share your favorite gaming anecdote here, if you have one.

QUESTIONS FOR MALE GAMERS WHO HAVE PLAYED IN MIXED GENDER GROUPS

1. How long have you been gaming?

2. List the games that you enjoy or have enjoyed playing (table top or on line rpgs, computer/videogames, MMOS, board games LARPS or others)

3. Tell the story of how you started, what or who drew you into gaming? How were your first gaming sessions? Etc. etc.

4. Do you enjoy playing with others or alone the most?

4b. If you have a clear preference, could you please motivate why you prefer one over the other.

4c. If you do not have a clear preference, could you mention some strong points with either or both ways of gaming

5. If you play or have played in groups, do you have any preference on gender balance in a gaming group? (somewhat equal in gender ratios, mostly females, mostly males) Please motivate why you have a preference, if this is the case.

6. When did you first game in a gender mixed environment? Please elaborate on this experience as much as you want.

7. Do you think there is a general difference in style or culture between female gamers and male gamers? (if yes, please elaborate)

8. What about the games themselves, have you ever experienced that games or game developers cater to a specific gender? (if yes, please elaborate)

9. Recent studies have shown that about half of all gamers are female, and yet some male gamer groups have expressed surprise at these statistics. Why do you think this comes as a surprise to many? Could female gamers be less visible in various settings, and if so, how come?

10. Would you please share your favorite gaming anecdote here, if you have one.

Just for fun, once I get my answers to these questions finished, I think I’ll post them here on this blog. I’ve been a gamer for years and years and I love talking about it.

Because you know what that implies? Are there really femmebots out there, complete with boob guns that make up the category of “not real” women? Are there girls made out of plastic? Is there a test you have to take, or are there government regulations sort of like they have for beef that mean we get tagged as real women, right next to the stamp stating we’re organic, because hey we’re composed of carbon-containing molecules?

It’s a bullshit term. It always struck me wrong when I went to Lane Bryant and was rewarded with “real woman dollars” for shopping. But the wrongness burst into ugly life when I re-watched the episode of Project Runway where one of the designers is a giant toolbag to a plus-size lady. The utter patronizing tone in which its delivered and that it’s obvious he’s using it in place of “fat” because he’s trying to weasel out of being eviscerated for being an asshole is even more insulting.

You’re not fooling anyone. We shouldn’t need some kind of smirking consolation prize for wearing clothing that’s bigger than a 16. We already know we’re real. We exist. It’s a sad disguise for the fact that often plus-size clothing feels like cultural punishment by setting set us in an adversarial position to women who wear “normal” sizes. Perhaps if we’re too busy trying to look down our noses at each other, we’ll miss the evil truth that we’re being compelled to attack people who should be our allies in this struggle, divided falsely along superficial lines.

Or maybe I’m reading too much into it. Maybe it’s just a pathetic attempt to make us feel better about ourselves. Hey, you’re large and are apparently considered unworthy to wear anything other than black smocks (it’s slimming, you know) but you’re a real woman. As if realness is determined by mass rather than an authenticity of spirit.

Being a woman isn’t a contest that some of us have to lose. There is a full spectrum of women to which we all belong, an infinite continuum of what it means to “look like a woman,” and no part of that spectrum should be defined as inherently superior. Doing that (and then gleefully jumping over a cliff with the invention of photoshop) is what got us into this mess in the first place.

I’m tired of the implication that my struggle to accept myself has to come at the detriment of other women.

Real women are fat. Real women are thin. Real women come in all colors and shapes and identities, and sometimes we have curves, and sometimes we don’t but damnit we’re all real women.

And we’re all really beautiful.