Author: Alex

Categories
movie review

Gotta Dance

This movie was on instant play on Netflix and I had some time to kill while I ate dinner, so I thought I’d just put it on for a bit. I’m not normally one for documentaries or cute, but I actually ended up watching it all the way through to the end and enjoyed it quite a bit.

The film is about the 2007 senior hip-hop dance team for the New Jersey Nets. If ever there was a movie designed to make you feel better about getting older, that would be it. Initially, you sort of feel like it’s a thing that might be played for laughs, but that definitely isn’t the case. They train hard, and actually face being not allowed to perform at one point because their run through isn’t good enough.The oldest member of the team is a 80-year-old lady named Fanny, and I’m pretty sure she dances better than I’ll ever manage.

I think it also definitely makes the point that the key to staying young at heart is finding something you love and not being afraid to do it. I wish I was even half as fearless as that when it came to things that didn’t let me hide behind my keyboard.

Though I think my favorite bits were watching the team hang out together, going dancing or shopping for clothes to suit up Betsy, one of the team members who had grown a lot of confidence from the experience. Heartwarming is a word I’ll happily apply, and not in a sneering hipster way. It made me feel happy and right with the world, and it’s nice to have movies like that on occasion.

It also made me want to dance.

Still attempting to get excited about the remake of Total Recall, coming out this weekend. I’ll go see it anyway, I promise. And maybe I’ll have nice things to say about it. Maybe I won’t. Time will tell.

Categories
write-a-thon writing

GOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAL

With 19 hours to spare, I finished the last of my six short stories for the Clarion Write-a-thon. Woof, what a slog.

I had eight donors total. Thank you, all you lovely people! I’ll be drawing a name out of a hat (or, more likely, using an RNG) to pick who will be the lucky winner of naming a character in one of my steampunk stories. Expect that in a day or two. I just don’t even have the brainpower necessary to write names on bits of paper right now, I swear.

If you’d like to read an excerpt from this last story, you can check the blog for my write-a-thon team.

This has definitely been a learning experience for me.

Total, I wrote around 35,000 words over six weeks. Last year, I wrote 99,000 words over those same six weeks. And let me tell you, for all that’s over twice as much, those 99K words were a hell of a lot easier.

I have a rough time with short stories. I did a lot of staring at blank pages and trying to figure out what the hell I was doing. It’s way harder than just having a big plot and writing until it’s done. Of course, one of the mistakes I made this time around is that I didn’t have six stories planned out. I didn’t even have base ideas for them. Of the stories, two were planned in advance. Generating the other four ideas quickly and under pressure was a lot rougher than I expected it to be.

My brain is toast. I’m definitely short-storied out for a while, at least for new writing. Two of the stories I think I can submit for open calls that are due on August 31, so I’ll be doing some editing between now and then. The rest can percolate a while longer.

I still have plenty of work that needs doing. I owe my patient editor the first round from Murder on the Titania. I want to get this damn novel draft finished some time soon. I need to start outlining the next Captain Ramos story, since the first draft of that will be due by the end of the year and once I get back to school my writing time is going to be very limited.

I also came up with an idea that I’ve fallen in love with, just randomly as I was leaving work today. I’m letting it percolate, and we’ll see if I’m still in love with it when I can start working on something new that’s long. Because this feels big. But the working title for this project is The Bridge Over the Graveyard of Whales. I know, I know, my title fail. Right now my excuse is that my brain is just juiced. I’ll come up with a different excuse tomorrow.

Categories
olympics

"Monstering" – now that’s a good word.

As a follow-up from yesterday’s post, Ye Shiwen has taken numerous drug tests and been shown to be clean of any doping. Hell yeah, woman, good for you! There’s a phenomenal editorial in the Guardian about the utterly shitty way people are still going after her, which I definitely recommend you read.

I hadn’t really thought about the potential racist/nationalist element in it as well, because I was too busy being incredibly pissed off about the overt misogyny of Performing Too Well While Female. I suppose China is the new superpower to be feared. My own thoughts on human rights abuses aside, I’ve never understood the logic of disapproving of a country by being childish toward their athletes. I was still in grade school when the Cold War ended so I missed out on a lot of the more ridiculous US versus USSR stuff, but whenever I encounter its relics now I still feel incredibly puzzled. Yes, athletes act as a representative of the country’s might and blah blah blah but how exactly does being a jerk have any kind of policy impact? I’d be shocked (and appalled) if anyone ever sat down at the negotiating table and tried to use the great performance of their men’s gymnastics team as leverage.

It doesn’t really seem to be about disapproving of policies or politics, but rather just feeling threatened that maybe America doesn’t get to be the best at everything ever. There are a lot of people in this world, and someone does eventually get to be the best at something. Statistically, they can’t all be from America, whatever advantages we may or may not have. And at this point I’m so heartily sick of the doctrine of American Exceptionalism that it’s gone through annoyance to eye-rolling malaise.

Which is really a long way of saying I wish America would grow the fuck up. Every time another country outdoes us at something the reaction tends to be either outright denial (“We do too have the best healthcare system ever!”) or doing an excellent mean girl impression. And I know there are other countries out there who think their way of life gives them some sort of inherent superiority, to which I also say: In the end we’re all still just human beings. Please grow the fuck up.

One of my fellow interns is Chinese. He and I regularly check the Olympic medal standings and tease each other about them. There’s nothing wrong with friendly competition. If China manages to take home more medals than us, I’ll slap him on the back and buy him some soft-serve from the cafeteria. That’s how it’s supposed to work. You have fun competing, and then no matter who wins there are congratulations all around because everybody tried their hardest. Yeah, sometimes it’s hard to be happy for someone else when you had your heart in it. That’s something I still obviously have to work on myself. But hey, that’s part of being a grown-up human being.

I think it’s probably also part of being a grown-up country.

Not related but also good commentary on icky things at the Olympics: Laurie Penny on beach volleyball

Categories
feminism olympics

But don’t do *too* well.

One of the Chinese swimmers has been accused of doping because she swam too well, beating her personal best by seven seconds. Like a “superwoman.” This is the bit out of the article that really bugs me:

Ye stunned world swimming on Saturday by winning gold in the 400m individual medley in a world-record time. It was her final 100m of freestyle, in which she recorded a split time of 58.68sec, that aroused Leonard’s suspicion. Over the last 50m she was quicker than the American Ryan Lochte, who won the men’s 400m individual medley in the second-fastest time in history.

I can’t really say one way or the other what’s going on. Maybe there’s doping, maybe there’s not. It’ll come out eventually. But some of the way this is being framed reminds me a lot of Caster Semenya in 2008; she was accused of being a man and got treated shamefully because she ran too well. It was total bullshit and I’m incredibly glad she’s back for 2012 so I can cheer for her some more. I suppose I should feel relieved that so far no one’s accused Ye Shiwen of not being a woman. But when one of the major warning signs is that a woman out swam a man, yeah. Gives me that super uncomfortable feeling.

Of course, men get accused of doping just as much, and it is a major problem in sports. Though it seems to me that it’s this insane game of pressure on athletes. Perform like a superhuman, but if you’re too superhuman, prepare to be regarded with chilling suspicion. With added nasty implications from the opposing team, because making it to the Olympics doesn’t mean one can take being skunked with sportsmanlike grace. It also feels like there’s an extra side of shit for this deluxe combo shit meal for female athletes, since there seems to be an expectation that they will perform at peak while still being feminine enough, whatever the hell that even means.

I sincerely hope that Ye Shiwen is cleared of the allegations of doping, and that she is just such a giant badass she got a better time than a guy. That would be amazing. Almost as amazing as Caster Semenya.

I’d much rather read about the badminton scandal, since just combining those two words makes it automatically hilarious.

Categories
freedom of speech rants someone is wrong on the internet

You keep using those words. I do not think they mean what you think they mean.

So there was the thing over at Jim C Hines’ blog, where I made the mistake of reading comments and once again it made me wonder if we could claim that part of humanity is just something we found on the curb, like an unwanted couch. Jim canceled his Reddit Q&A because there was a really gross thread on Reddit where rapists were talking about the hows and whys of the awful things they’ve done; he gave an ultimatum that either that thread needed to go, or no Q&A from him.

Immediately, whining about freedom of speech ensued. This is not an uncommon reaction, I’ve noticed.  Christian apologists for Chick-fil-a have been applying this juvenile argument as well, to tell us we’re all being mean for not buying their delicious hate chicken and thus tacitly endorsing their anti-gay agenda. Apparently, freedom of speech has been redefined on the internet as, “I have a right to say anything horrible I want and you’re not allowed to protest or try to stop me.”

No. That’s not how it works. And there’s no cognitive dissonance necessary to believe in free speech as a right (via the Constitution) and not wanting to let trolls shit all over your comments section.

This would be because while we all like to say we’re part of the government of the United States, this being a representative democracy and all, none of us are actually the government, and none of us are making laws. The power of the state (and now of large corporations) can be a horrible, chilling thing, and it should be kept well away from speech, even really reprehensible speech. (Because of nothing else, one man’s reprehensible speech is another man’s important point.)

But as I said, I’m not the state, Jim C. Hines isn’t the state, and any website with a commenting policy that keeps a terminal asshole buildup from occurring is also not the state. We’re administrators of our own blogs/websites, and whining at us about freedom of speech is equivalent to whining at your mom because she won’t let you say fuck in the house, and about as effective.

Is it hypocritical, though, to say you believe in free speech and at the same time police jerks on your own space? (Or refuse to share space with shameful people?) No, I don’t think so. I have just as much a right to express my opinion as the next person – and actually more, when it’s my personal space. I’m not obligated to let my obnoxious Ron-Paul-loving neighbor put a campaign sign on my lawn. Likewise, I’m not obligated to let words that are abhorrent or abusive stand on a space that is mine to control. Want to say awful things? Get your own space.

But what about Jim demanding Reddit take the thread down as a condition for him doing the Q&A?

In the world of emergency medicine, unconsciousness implies consent. In the world of speech, silence likewise implies consent, and agreement. Appearing quietly in the same space as something you find abhorrent implies that you are all right with the existence of that abhorrent thing.

And I think that’s an important part that often gets left off on these rants about free speech.

Outside of the realm of law (which obvious does not apply here because hey – not the government!) words have meaning, and consequence. When you run across something despicable, you have a very limited set of choices – you can ignore it, say nothing, move on, or you can protest. If you say nothing, if you do nothing, your silence provides your tacit agreement.

That’s why it’s important, for example, that Anonymous showed up to stand between the Westboro Baptist Church and the attendees of the memorial in Aurora, CO, even if WBC didn’t show up. Why it’s important that Chick-fil-a is facing a boycott for their anti-gay policies. Why when you hear someone say something racist, or sexist, or homophobic it’s important that you argue, even if it means making Christmas dinner kind of uncomfortable.

Some of the most important speech you will ever make is to stand up and say “No, this is wrong, and I refuse to be part of it.”

Related: Civility and free speech at Talking Philosophy. This also addresses why it’s not contrary to believe in free speech and simultaneously demand a minimum level of civility in your blog. And unlike my opinion, contains no swear words.

Categories
olympics

Missing out on that Olympic spirit

I actually do like the Olympics. Or at least bits of it.

In the past, I’ve made it my business to watch gymnastics, archery, diving, fencing, weightlifting, and a lot of other sports. I’m not really someone that’s in to sports generally. I think watching them is a lot less fun than going out and doing stuff, but I make an exception for the Olympics. It gives me a chance to watch sports that aren’t normally televised or all that celebrated. It lets me cheer for underdogs that really are underdogs as opposed to one team of incredibly wealthy men versus another team of incredibly wealthy men.

And I’m actually kind of pissed off this year that I seem to be missing all of it.

Some of this is my own fault. I don’t have a television, so the only way for me to watch it is on the computer. Nicely enough, I now have two computers that are fit for watching television, so I could conceivably have the games on one while still doing work on the other.

Except for the part where NBC sucks. Oh yeah, that.

I tried going to the official NBC site for the Olympics. Apparently you’re not allowed to watch online unless you’re already a cable or dish subscriber. Which I find kind of mind-boggling, because why the hell would you be watching the games online if you could already do so on your television? Maybe they’re trying to hit the valuable people-trapped-in-the-airport demographic.

For the record, I don’t have cable. I don’t want cable. I don’t watch enough TV to justify the expense, and I’d really rather just do my watching online via streaming service like Netflix and Hulu, which I do pay for.

I just really don’t understand it. They could put all the commercials they’d like in streaming online feeds, and they’d get seen. Hell, they’d get seen by people like me who normally manage to evade television advertisements. You’d think that would be desirable.

And this isn’t even touching on some of NBC’s other unfathomable decisions, like the time delay on the opening ceremonies, or that they edited out chunks of it because apparently Americans are just too self-absorbed to appreciate the tragedies memorialized by other countries.

At this point, if I want to watch the Olympics, I’m going to have to pretend to be British in order to do it. Well, there are worse things. But the number of flaming hoops NBC is putting between people and the games feels like a reminder that it’s not really about the spirit of sport and competition, if it ever was. It’s commercialization and controlling the product now, I guess.

Damnit, I just wanted to watch women’s weightlifting, not unwind my eye-rolling cynicism. Was that too much to ask?

Categories
writing

I write a horrible story (also known as: trunk stories, what are those?)

It happens sometimes. It kind of has to, if you think about it. Not everything you write is going to be wonderful. In fact, particularly when you’re starting out, more of it will suck than will not suck.

The difference for me is that normally, when I hit a story that I just start hating, I stop writing it. Then delete what little I have written, often while doing my best Bela Lugosi laugh. Unfortunately, since right now I’m the Clarion Write-a-thon’s bitch and I’m on a strict timetable, that wasn’t really an option. So even though I’d decided that this story and I weren’t going to be friends by about word 1500, I kept plugging away at it because I was past the point of no return. I needed to finish this thing or risk missing my goals.

Writing something awful that you hate is a uniquely bad experience, I think. I discovered all new levels of procrastination, trying to avoid engaging with this story. I eventually had to unplug my router so that I’d have to focus on the task of just ripping the bandaid off and getting it done.

This all, of course, segues nicely into the question what the heck a trunk story is. Since this thing I just finished is, without a doubt, a trunk story.

I was very confused by the term when I first started submitting stories to magazines. There are quite a few that say something to the effect of, “And don’t send us your trunk stories” actually in their guidelines. I figured that if I didn’t know what a trunk story actually was, I probably shouldn’t worry about it.

Well, yes and no.

My little writerlings, the definition isn’t really a set one, so here’s how I think of it. Trunk stories are stories you know aren’t good. Stories that don’t quite work and you can’t seem to fix. Stories you no longer believe in. Stories that taught you something valuable about the writing process but have no outer redeeming value. Stories that are effectively a waste of an editor’s time.

I know this is a weird place for us as writers. We are always and forever our own worst, nastiest critics. But at the same time, you still need to believe in the stories you’re trying to sell. You need to believe that they are the best you have to offer, and they are worth fighting for and taking rejection after rejection over. If you find yourself thinking, “Well this story is crap but maybe publication X will still give me a penny per word for it,” stop. It’s a trunk story.

There’s no shame in having trunk stories. I have a sub-folder in my writing file literally titled, “The Trunk of Awfulness.” That’s where all my bad stories go. It’s also the place for stories that I think are all right, but not something I believe in enough to keep throwing them at editors.

I think part of the process of writing and writing a lot is learning to recognize earlier when one of your stories is just not going to work. It sucks a bit when you’ve invested a lot of time in something and then realize that it’s terrible.

But also think of it this way – every story you write teaches you something. And if you’re writing terrible stories, it also means that you’re going to write good ones too. I suggest that, like your rejections, you consider your trunk stories a point of pride. It means you’re working damn hard.

Categories
cycling

Dog vs. Man Collision

This is something that happened at the Katy Flatland Century, which is still bugging the crap out of me.

After leaving the third rest stop on the metric century route, a dog ran across the road right behind me. It startled the hell out of me, and for a minute I thought he was going for my tires. (Which is a thing that happens.) But instead the dog went barreling full-bore into the cyclist behind me and literally knocked him off his bike.

I stopped and ran back to help. I’m guessing the dog was okay – he ran into the yard of the house we were passing, and there were other dogs there so I didn’t want to go check and intrude on their territory. The cyclist was mostly okay. He had his helmet on, but he tore up his knee pretty bad and was hurting. Me and another cyclist helped him get back on his feet, get his chain back on his bike, and then he headed back to the rest stop, probably to call it a day.

The other guy that stopped to help seemed pretty sure the dog hadn’t been going after the cyclist either. He thought the dog might have wanted to cross the road and just timed it badly, maybe a little scared by us. Which makes sense, the way it happened. (However, dogs chasing you while you’re on your bike and going after your legs or the tires is a thing that happens, and it’s scary.)

What bothers me about the whole thing is that this dog was just wandering around. The front yard of that house was open, so all of the other dogs were free to wander as well with no one to watch them. I understand Katy is kind of out in the country, so to speak – it’s all fields and the occasional house in that area – but there’s a road right there, and it has a speed limit of 45. There were plenty of cars on it with us as well.

Just seems like a bad, bad idea to me. The poor dog probably got through colliding with a cyclist okay. That wouldn’t be the case with a car.

Categories
horror movie video game

Silent Hill: Revelation and Pyramid Head

io9 has posted the new trailer for Silent Hill: Revelation.

It looks like it’s based off of the third game of the Silent Hill series, which is probably my second favorite. Honestly, it should probably my favorite, but I played Silent Hill 2 first and it’s just kind of stuck with me. James is just so wonderfully ineffectual as a hero, I can’t quite get over it.

Heather, the heroine of Silent Hill 3, is infinitely more badass and has a lot of snappy dialog. I’m really hoping that’ll come through in the movie, since she isn’t one to just stare in horror and make the ‘I’m just about to vomit from an overload of fear’ face that seems to be the way most women emote in horror movies. She’s competent.

Though of course, who knows how close this will come to the game. I’ve already got a bad feeling, here, considering it sounds like Heather calls the Kit Harrington character “Vincent.” He sure as hell doesn’t look like a priest in the evil cult of Silent Hill. I’m getting a horror movie teen romance vibe from it, and that really misses the point of the entire story being about Heather through and through. There’s no room for a love story; it would be unnecessary and distracting from how cool the character is, even if the guy gets to be the damsel in distress for once. (And if he’s not, expect ranting.)

Perhaps unusually, I didn’t hate the first Silent Hill movie. It didn’t make an enormous impression on me – I can barely remember most of it – and it’s not as if I own a copy or have gone out of my way to see it more than once. But I remember it had some style, and I appreciated that there were certain things done incredibly well, like the nurses, Pyramid Head, and the creepy air raid siren. From the brief glimpses in the trailer, the nurses still look great. I’m reserving judgment on Pyramid Head, since I’m always worried he’s going to get overused or have his menace sapped by doing un-Pyramid-Head-like things. (Such as the bit where he seems to be driving some kind of machinery in the trailer.)

Because this is the thing about Pyramid Head. He’s terrifying in the same way old school, shambling zombies are terrifying. He’s not in a rush. He’s virtually indestructible. And you know no matter how fast you run, he’s going to eventually catch up and then you’re going to end up cut in half by a sword longer than you are tall. He doesn’t really make any sound, either. It’s all just the scrape of the sword on the ground, screeee screee.

True story: I’m too much of a weenie to play horror games. So when I say that I played one, what I actually mean is that my best friend Kat actually played it, while I sat behind her and offered frantic, helpful advice like, “Run! Run! Why aren’t you running? Shoot it! Shoot!” etc.

The first time we played Silent Hill 2, we were stuck on the roof of the hospital. I went and looked at a gamefaq to figure out what we were missing. Well, we were just supposed to go to one part of the roof, look at the diary pages there, and then we’d get a cut scene with Pyramid Head but it was okay because he wouldn’t actually hurt us.

Okay, there were the diary pages. Cut scene any moment now. Any moment… now. Any moment… now?

screeeeeee screeeeeee

At which point I screamed, perhaps louder than I had screamed in my entire life as the game camera whipped around to face Pyramid Head. Loud enough that I scared Kat into throwing the controller and jumping over the back of the couch.

I don’t know what it is about that monster. He still scares the hell out of me even when I know he’s coming. He’s a force of nature. Evil, horrifying nature that involves wearing a leather apron that is, for all I know, made out of human skin. And has a giant metal pyramid obscuring his entire head, which you’d think would be hilarious only it not.

So we’ll see. I imagine that I’ll end up seeing this movie, hopefully with Kat. But not in 3D.

Because of course, like all things today, the movie is going to be in 3D. Though apparently it was actually filmed in 3D rather than given a computer shop job. Fascinating, but not enough to make me want to endure having glasses perched over my glasses, or spending an hour and a half feeling like I’m going to vomit into my hat.

Though for the life of me, every time I see Silent Hill: Revelation IN 3D all I can think is this:

(Weird Al Yankovic: Nature Trail to Hell in 3D)

Threat level: Pyramidalicious (pessimistic but willing to be surprised)

Related: I’ve been to Centralia, the town that inspired Silent Hill.

Categories
cycling Team Loki

Soldier in #LokisArmy? Cyclist?

I want YOU to join Team Loki.

I’ve been thinking of this since I rode the metric century at Katy Flatlands, where just for fun I signed on as Team Loki. Loki’s Army is big, strong, and infinitely badass. I can’t be the only one that likes pounding out the miles. (In fact, I know I’m not, since we’re already a three person, international team.)

Together we can:

  • Encourage and help each other get fit and train.
  • Ride formal and informal events.
  • Spread the love of our sport.
  • Raise money for charity.
  • Dominate.

None of these things require that we live in the same place. That’s what the internet is for. I want cyclists at every level, road and racing and mountain. There’s a place for you on the team whether you do races or just like riding your bike to the grocery store. Newbie? That’s fine, I’ve only been riding since March.

All you need is a bicycle and glorious purpose.

If you’re interested, let’s talk. You can tweet at me (@katsudonburi) or e-mail me at katsuhiro at gmail dot com.